Today, i go to work in such bad mood. Go to here by mind, not by heart. I want to change another place bc I begin to be bored with here. But i cant do it. I am not brave enough to leave or to do other thing. I seem to pessimistic. I cut all contact outside and no talk to friends. At the weekend, I only stayed at home, watched TV, listened to Radio, ate, slept and thought very much. I started to think nonsense about other friend, different kind of something. I opened Facebook and lookes photos of others for some hours- It is wasted of time but i did it.Regreted so much.
I realized that i didnt have incentive over the past days. Having it I can be glad and confident of myself to live. I shouldnt be like that, I am not allowed to be like that. I was wrong when I treat my friend like that. I am sorry to all.
Why now I cant have incentive to live continuously? I miss E a lot, I want to learn J, C, K a lot but I am too stupid. Law, i give up. So now i dont know where to go. Continue to seat here? continue to surf net everyday? Continue to wonder, think and no action? If like that I am so bad, bad. I am standing still, could u help me to step outside, could u pull me out of this case. No, no one can except me.
Haizzzzz, why i am like this. How can make more money now, How to be more optimistic now? where to go to practise my passion? These questions need to stay here and I have to answer it. But how to answer? Huhuhu....geezzz...zzzzzzzz
"Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance. Great dancers are not great because of their technique, they are great because of their passion."
